Do you know what’s the worst thing about starting up a home business, besides the two weeks my husband is on vacation and decides he wants to help me? I’ll tell you: it’s the “helpful” advice that you get from your so-called friends and family members, all of whom usually wear suits.

You know the worn-out advice…

“Well, Stella, you know that only one out of ten startup business is ever successful.” I started mine up nine times just in case.

“I’d hate to start up a business in this risky economy…” Yeah, it would be much better to be laid off in a risky economy.

“Nothing succeeds like success.” See. I don’t even know what that means.

“Get a real job.” That’s right. Running your own business isn’t real, is it? And I’m a CARTOON. Do you know how hard it is to find a real job as a cartoon character?

And last but not least: “Make hay while the sun shines.” What? Who makes hay anymore? Do you really make hay, at all? Is there some new mechanical process through which one could make a crop of hay.

All I’m saying, Starter Uppers, is be careful who your advisers are.

Did I just give you advice? Crap.

–Stella